Add & Subtract - 3 Pillars of Transformation Part 3

Aug 20, 2023

Today our final look at the 3 Pillars of Transformation


When we are done with understanding and shadow work to release all that remains stuck from challenging experiences, we can complete the transmutation of trauma into wisdom and growth.

We do this by stepping beyond our human perspective enough to witness the whole story from a greater sense of Self. By moving into the expanded awareness of our spiritual Self, we know that our truer identity was not harmed by the events: nothing Real was damaged or destroyed, that ours and others ‘missed deeds’ eventually led to learning and evolution.

Author and healer Sonia Choquette:

“As souls, we incarnate to learn certain lessons, the most important of these being to remember our Divine nature while having human experiences.

Life’s lessons, challenges, concerns, obstacles, recurring themes, and difficult patterns make up what we colloquially call the “ stuff” of our lives.

Every one of us - from the beggar in India to the broker on Wall Street to the Dalai Lama - has “stuff” or personal soul work that provides challenges.

These lessons are our souls’ work. They may be lessons of love, of creating prosperity, or of physical health. They may be ones of trust and commitment or of relationships and family. They may be lessons of poverty, abandonment, and loss… or just the opposite - of wealth, acquisition, and devotion”

Source: The Answer is Simple: Love Yourself, Live your Spirit


It is so easy to get stuck in our stories. We can become so closely identified to what happened to us (or what we have done), that we remain too earthbound, unable to finish extracting the growth out of our “stuff”.

Sometimes we get lots of caring attention for being a victim of trauma, disability, illness. This ‘reward’ can unintentionally encourage us to stay stuck in old stories about ourselves rather than strive to heal beyond them and extract the lessons out of our situation, discovering a greater meaning within the dirt of life.

We can also resist forgiving ourselves for mistakes we have made, hurts we have caused. Once we have made amends, rectified the situation as best we can, and taken full responsibility to do better, it is appropriate to let our “bad person’ stories go as well.

From Chuck Palahniuk:

“When you understand, that what you're telling is just a story. It isn't happening anymore. When you realize the story you're telling is just words, when you can just crumble up and throw your past in the trashcan, then we'll figure out who you're going to be”

Source: Invisible Monsters

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